Get Past Feeling Down About Your Body Today
Many women feel the blues as summer approaches because they feel their body is again not where they want it to be.
Summer is associated with the outdoors, more physical activity, and less clothing. Despite their best intentions, many women find that every summer they are faced with a feeling of disappointment in themselves for not being in better shape. Intentions to get fit and lose the weight gained during the holidays have not been realized. Instead of happily going about savoring the season, it’s another summer of feeling self-conscious and frustrated about body image.
Although it’s not possible to change the past, it is possible to prevent having the same frustration and disappointment next year, and it’s not too late to get more fit while enjoying what’s left of summer today. It’s possible no matter what our body size. It’s all in how we approach things.
Beating Yourself Up Is a Useless Practice
For some reason many people think that if they beat themselves up about something they feel they’ve done wrong, it will motivate them to do better. As a matter of fact, the more a person reprimands herself the harder it will be to accomplish what she set out to do.
Imagine a child trying to learn to tie her shoe. It’s not difficult to see that if the child is put down every time she makes a mistake, she will become anxious and frustrated. This level of stress interferes with the child’s concentration and motivation making it difficult for her to learn the task. If, instead, the child is praised and reinforced for her efforts and achievements, she will feel enthused and gain confidence making her more successful.
Adults are no different than children in this respect. Everybody needs positive strokes, not punishment, in order to be motivated and achieve goals. This is especially true when dealing with our body and weight loss expectations.
Start Where You Are
How we talk to ourselves about our body is important. Using “should” statements such as, “I should have lost all the extra weight by now,” “I’m too big to be in a bathing suit,” or “I shouldn’t go to the beach looking like this,” is how we beat ourselves up. Engaging in “should” statements makes us want to give up and guarantees that we’ll find ourselves in the same emotional place next summer.
It’s better to accept where we are today, set aside the past, and focus on what can be done now. If we do this, we’ll be in a better place at the end of the summer than we are right now – even if it’s not where we originally wanted to be. It’s better than no progress at all which is what will happen if we give up altogether.
Self-talk That Works
It’s never too late to change how we talk about our bodies. Try these statements on for size and then create some of your own:
- “It’s never too late to start positive changes.”
- “I want goals that are achievable. I’m not going to set deadlines for my body. I will follow something that I can keep up for a lifetime.”
- “I want to improve my body image by first accepting my body where it is and then going forward – one step at a time.”
- “Thinking about the past or what I haven’t accomplished will not get me anywhere. I’ll look ahead, not back.”
Summer blues about your body image can be a thing of the past if you go about it in a smart, positive way.
Previously published in www.suite101.com May 30, 2010
